Debbie, my wife, and I have been watching “This Old House” and
“Ask This Old House” each Thursday night for three years and have recently
found the confidence to undertake some small projects. We put crown molding over the sliding glass
door and around our bathroom mirrors. We
bought a fireplace mantle from MantlesDirect.com
and mounted it. We removed several
ceiling-mounted kitchen cabinets and even worked with drywall to patch the
holes. In most of these projects, power tools were used. The scope of our expertise is expanding.
Truth be told, in reality I am recovering from decades of regression. My father was a talented carpenter and
cabinetmaker, and my younger brother works
as a carpenter and builds cabinets and furniture. I never had the talent of either of them, but
I could be productive on the jobsite. I
could sink a nail into subflooring with three or four hammer swings. I could nail down shoe molding along a floor
with two hard and one soft swing of the hammer.
I have lost that ability; my present hammering is of unpredictable aim
and unreliable force. I have lost the
muscle memory I once had. Muscle memory
comes through repeatedly doing a specific motor task until a “memory” is
developed in your muscles, eventually allowing it to be performed without
conscious effort.
I believe our minds and hearts can be trained in the
same way. The “Jesus Prayer” is one way
that believers can create a type of “muscle memory” of faith and obedience in
their minds and hearts. The prayer is
quite simple: Lord Jesus Christ, son of
God, have mercy on me a sinner.”
This prayer dates from the 5th century. It has always been more popular in the
Eastern Orthodox Church than in the Western branch of Christianity. In thinking about sin, Eastern Christianity
has preserved a greater emphasis on the dynamic of sickness/ weakness and
healing. We in the West are more prone
to give a central place to the dynamic of guilt and forgiveness when
contemplating our sinfulness. Repentance
in Eastern Christianity is fueled more by a belief that we can change and less
by the need to have our sense of guilt disarmed.
I see the “Jesus Prayer” less as a reminder that we should
be continually wallowing in our guilt and more as a reminder that we can
change. The prayer begins by invoking
the name of Christ, who is the ground of all hope in our lives. We ask for
mercy, the only durable way forward for us.
Then we acknowledge the truth about ourselves: we are sinners. This confession does not discourage us because
we have already initiated our way forward through the prayer bathed in the
healing mercy we find in Jesus. The
prayer is a candid but hopeful confession.
Repeated recitation of the prayer conditions our hearts and minds to live our lives
under the mercy of God, fueled by an honest admission that we do not have to
remain the way we are; we can change. I am working to create a “muscle memory” in my heart and
mind that frames each day with the mercy of God and creates a hopeful urgency
that lets God change me.
I am also
continuing to condition my eye and hand to achieving a greater level of
carpentry skill. Next will we replace
the fronts on the bathroom cabinets or the broken faucet. Neither will necessitate the use of power
tools, unfortunately.
Blessings,Jim Kelsey
